...a male & female point of view...We are two former coworkers who share similar ideas on what's absurd...or just plain funny...thought we could offer a unique view on life & stuff...

Tuesday, November 30, 2004


"Let the Fun Out"

OK...who put the Reddi-Wip (that's actually how it's spelled...
stump your friends with trivia like this...& they'll love you forever...
or be so annoyed that they'll kick you in the ass...can't possibly lose
either way!) in my fridge? I found it there last night...while I was standing
in front of the fridge with the door open...looking for nothing in particular.
My sis must have brought it with her sinful pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving.
Anyway, there it was. I looked at it ...& in an instant...I had the cap off...
& a mouthful of cream. Sweet lord...that stuff is yummy! What the fuck
am I going to do with this stuff??? I'm alone for the next couple of days...
alone in the house with Reddi-Wip ? Holy Mother of God...
what's a girl to do?! It just seems a shame to lick it off myself.
I feel like a kid with a cool toy...& no one to play with.

I checked out The Reddi-Wip site. They have a section called
Reddi-Wip Moments. If I wasn't alone...I'd send mine in.


Monday, November 29, 2004


Maintain That Fat Ass During the Holidays

Upon going to the gym today...after a four day absence...
(& believe me...I NEED to go this time of year...
when you’re short EVERY pound shows)...
I bumped into Wendy. Wendy’s one of the skinny girls who work at the gym.
I had no grace today...so I really did... literally bump into her...
I know because I felt her bones hit me (like I said...she’s SKINNY).
She was hanging a sign on the bulletin board at the entrance to the gym.
What it said struck me as comical. In big, bold type, it said
“Maintain Your Weight During the Holidays". I looked into her eyes
& said that I didn't think I'd have too much of a friggin problem maintaining
my weight! I meant it to be funny...but maybe I said it in a harsh...
mean sounding way...because she didn't laugh. She told me the sign
was meant to motivate everyone to stay in shape...especially this time of year.

Apparently, she has NO sense of humor... due to the fact that she probably
never eats...come to think of it...that would make me crabby...but would it
make me stupid too?

Friday, November 26, 2004


Comfortably Numb

I am sitting here...one of the few people in the office
on this day after Thanksgiving...
in my now... too tight jeans. I'm comfortably numb.
Yesterday went by in a blur of mashed potatoes,
turkey, gravy...oh my...I ate like a dying girl...
with an appetite for life.

Tuesday, November 23, 2004


These Shoes Were Made For...

Originally uploaded by Chick.
I went out dancing this weekend. I haven't done that in a long, long time. Of course, just us girls wanted to go...so it quickly became LADIES NIGHT. I love going out with the girls. It usually turns into the kind of uninhibited, silly, fun night that I wish wouldn't end. I've never dated (or been married to) a man who loves to dance. My thinking is...what's not to love about dancing? I dance like a nut...& badly at that...but do I care? Not really. Why do most men care that they think they look foolish dancing? No one's laughing...I just think it's great that they are out there at all.

These are my new dancing shoes (after a night of dancing). The Kate Spade shoes I posted earlier were not in my budget...so I fell in love with these instead.

Monday, November 22, 2004



I just checked myself out in the ladies room mirror. I had gotten dressed
for work this morning with the best of intentions (as I always try to),
but I seemed to have missed the mark somehow today. I'm wearing
black pants with a grey top & black boots. Very bland & without color,
I thought...but then I saw the PINK...& I DO mean pink, panties I had on
underneath. They match perfectly to the PINK bra I also have on today.

My mood is consistent with my wardrobe. I feel sort of conservative
& restrained on the outside...but full of life & color on the inside.

Sunday, November 21, 2004


it was as big as...

I just saw the biggest, baddest motherfucking spider! AND it was in my house! My first thought was to wait til hubby got home...then he could slay the dragon...I mean spider for me. Two minutes went by...I couldn't move. OK...my only recourse was to go upstairs to get the vacuum & suck the damn thing up. If he snuck off while I was going up the stairs...I think I would have had to sell the house...because then...I'd never find him...but I'd know he was still lurking around somewhere...just waiting for an opportune moment to GET ME! So I told the spider to STAY...and he did...he stopped moving and froze. I knew he could hear me, he was as big as a small dog...I'm not kidding...so he may as well have taken commands like one too.

Well, I lived to tell the tale, I'm happy to say. I sucked him up into the vacuum with the longest attachment that I could find. My husband's going to wonder why the vacuum is outside on the front porch when he gets home, he's going to make fun of me when I tell him my story...especially the part about how spidey could easily crawl back out of the vacuum & terrorize me some more...but I know he'd say nothing if he only knew the actual size of the beast I killed with the vacuum...besides, he wasn't here to do his job & he knows that's why I married him in the first place.

Thursday, November 18, 2004



SN (who probably does not want me to link to her) put it very well when she
wrote, "I can see it all there in your eyes...what we have is enough"

I've decided that I have a need to appreciate all that I have in my life that
make if worth actually getting out of bed each morning. (NO, this is not some
kind of Thanksgiving inspired, hokey, sunshine & light post that could possibly
make you vomit, at least I hope it's not).

Sometimes, it's nice to feel you have enough. By that I mean, to take a break
from wanting. To be content to as long as you can stand it. So far, I've felt
this way for...oh, I don't know...maybe two hours, pretty good, huh?

Without going into detail about these things (because they also suck sometimes)
these things make me feel like I have 'enough':

My husband (who takes my shit...sometimes.)

Our families (unconditional love comes to mind.)

Funny & caring friends near & far (crap, do I have to put Dick in this

My great house (it's got a cool, Brady Bunch oven in a brick wall in the kitchen.)

My cool, creative job (it doesn't suck.)

Ah, the peace I feel from knowing that I have enough. How long do you think this feeling will last?


Tuesday, November 16, 2004


For The Love of Shoes

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Women & shoes...ever since I wore my first Maryjane's in grade school, my love of shoes has known no bounds. Would I spend $255.00 on these kick ass Kate Spade pumps if it was at all possible at this point in my life? You bet my booty I would! A girl's got to have her indulgences, right? The instant gratification I'd experience, first trying them on, walking around the store (falling more in lust with the shoes from the new...4 precious inches higher height that these shoes would bestow on me), paying for them & finally leaving the store with my treasure. If someone asked me if I'd whore myself out for shoes...I'd have to say...depends on the shoes : )

Inspired by a short post involving...shoes by Naughtier Nate


Thursday, November 11, 2004



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Have you been to The Land of Happy,
Where everyone’s happy all day,
Where they joke and they sing,
Of the happiest things,
And everyone’s jolly and gay?
There’s no one unhappy in Happy’
There’s laughter and smiles galore.
I have been to The Land of Happy-
What a bore!

From Where The Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein

...although, right about now...I wouldn’t say...no...to one of those ‘HAPPY PILLS’ that Dick’s been getting from his girlfriend.

Tuesday, November 09, 2004



...that was you?! Sorry.

Dick 8====o~

Cut Off

There are idiots out on the road, I’ve seen them, been followed & menaced by them & I still do not see the point of what they do. They scream, red faced, with veins bulging, through closed windows, traveling at high speeds down the highway. Do they think anyone can hear them?! Do they care? Is it just blind rage that inspires such ridiculousness?

Last night, while innocently driving myself home from another day at work, this maniac in a beat up blue car decided to cut me off. Fine, I think to myself, I’ll just turn the radio up & keep singing (I had a funky station on the radio & it was playing “It’s Raining Men”...nope, I’m not kidding...what a fun, silly song, great to sing along with & always makes me smile). I truly did not want to deal with road rage at this point in my day. Up the road I traveled, one lane became two lanes. Mr. “I just cut you off” slows to a crawl, forcing me to pass his ass in the left lane (proper passing procedure, I do believe). Somehow, this angers him. Suddenly, he turns his brights on behind me, blinding me. Why is he mad? He cut ME off?! Why would you try & blind the person in front of you? Making me lose control could only cause an accident for him too. I know that you shouldn’t try to comprehend “CRAZY” because there’s no explaining it...but who...in their sane mind, doesn’t try to understand what these people could possibly be thinking by doing such things?

He continued to follow me the rest of my journey home. I couldn’t lead him to my house & let this crazed wacko know where I lived...so what did I do? I pulled into my neighbor’s driveway. Nice of me to bring senseless lunacy to his doorstep, right? As I sat in my car, my heart beating through my chest, the hysterical fanatic sealed the driveway off by blocking it with his car. The only option that sprang into my brain was; I could beep the horn like a mad woman, in a, probably, vain attempt to scare him away...but I thought, this could backfire & bring the neighbor out of his house where he would be undoubtedly shot dead by this lunatic. My best option would have been using my cell phone to call the police, but unfortunately for me, I can not get any reception in my neighborhood. As I sat in my car, feeling like a scared idiot, Mr. crazy just might have had enough (demented psychos, thankfully...are not known for their infinite patience). He screeched away, doing about 80 MPH down my quite, residential street.

I will live to see another day...& the crazy people get more time to think about new ways to torture me or plot my demise.

Monday, November 08, 2004


Just Soooo Silly

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OK...how funny is this? I created a highly conceptualized (ha!) version of me & Dick on avatars.yahoo.com. This is making me laugh out loud...it’s just so silly. Anything for a good laugh on a Monday : )
All I have to say...to Dick is...Nice...REALLY nice!?

Friday, November 05, 2004


I'd do ya

About the silver haired cutie, I'd love to bang that!

Dick 8====o~

Thursday, November 04, 2004



Quizilla just kills me. They have a quiz to tell you what kind of an...anything...you are. This one was called, What Type of Girl are You? Apparently, this is how they see me. I love the big, soulful, saucer eyes...but flowing silver hair...I'm not so sure that works for me .


What Type Of Girl Are You???
brought to you by Quizilla


Wednesday, November 03, 2004


She smiled at me...

I spend the first part of last night slogging through the election coverage. When my mind could no longer take the red or blue state assault on my brain for one more minute...I decided to take refuge in reading. I picked up Back Roads by Tawni O’Dell and started to absorb this great story. This book is beautifully written:

“She smiled at me. It was a beautiful smile: one she made with her eyes, not just her mouth; one that came from her heart, not just just her head because I had touched something inside her that no one else ever did anymore. I didn’t know how I knew that but I did and even though I wanted to violate her a hundred different ways physically, I didn’t want to go anywhere near her soul.”

How...I ask you...could you NOT be pulled in by writing like that?
See Dick, my insight into your life just AMAZES you...doesn't it?!

Tuesday, November 02, 2004



Chick, I won't be able to blog any time soon, you see, um.. a friend of mine is having a wedding in South America and I told him I'd go. So I'll see you soon, wish me luck.

Dick 8===o

Election Day

Get out & vote today! For some reason I felt a huge sense of accomplishment after I hauled my ass to the voting booth this year.

Anyone who can make cartoons out of this mess...is OK with me : )

Vote today...or you have absolutely NO RIGHT to complain about any of it! & what fun would that be anyway?!


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