...a male & female point of view...We are two former coworkers who share similar ideas on what's absurd...or just plain funny...thought we could offer a unique view on life & stuff...

Friday, December 17, 2004


What the hell does that mean?

I met a philosopher in a bar the other night. I was waiting for my terminally late friend to show up when...AK parked his butt on a barstool next to mine.

He had a killer opening line...it went something like..."You're not the kind of
girl I usually see sitting all alone at a bar"...I stared at him blankly...what
could I say? Instead of saying..."what the hell does that mean?" I decided to
give him the benefit of the doubt...I was in the mood for a good chat & he
seemed willing to listen to me babble.

He was absentmindedly twisting his wedding ring...he told me he was married to a good woman...but he still felt the need to go out most nights without her.

Here's where I tell this stranger all the blah, blah...facts of my situation...being
married & needing things that I'm not currently receiving...(damn my late
friend...I can be very chatty when I've been drinking).

AK: Respectfully, I ask...from your heart...do you feel you've taken care of him
the way a wife should care for her man...? (Respectfully...my ass...there's no
respectful way to ask if you're servicing your husband to his liking...is
there?!) I want you to know that a woman holds the key to happiness in 99% of
relationships. Do you feel you can seek out & give your husband what he needs,
or is it never going to happen? If so, the road is clear. If not, perhaps it's
best to move on & begin again, inspite of the pain you'll feel... sorry for the
unsolicited (drunken) advise.

Me: the question of...did I do all I should have for my husband...I can honestly
say I'm doing my best. Why do you think that is?...women controlling happiness?

AK: Because men are much less complex. We're happy to have our partner's
approval, appreciation, & acceptance...but you can tell us we're loved a
thousand times a day & it doesn't get through...we're primitive in that regard &
must feel love from our partner...through the affection, her hunger, her
willingness to ensure we feel it intimately.
...Then, we'll pretty much paint your house, care for your kids, & swim thru
sharks to make you happy...and the woman who is wiling to put forth the energy
& respect for what I'm explaining...will likely have a loyal & happy partner.
But it seems very hard for a woman to maintain.

Me: I always find it interesting to know what men are thinking...really...

AK: Then you are lucky because that curiosity will likely serve you well.

Me: I hope so.
...& I know you are not talking solely about sex...right?

AK: Not entirely...

Sex is how men are assured of your love, acceptance & appreciation - - but there
are many more ways a woman can be nice, be happy & get her partner to do
anything she really needs from him...happily.

You just have to remember to nurture those 3-"A's" and when the time is right,
seal it with sex.

Me: appreciation, acceptance...& what?
(here's where I'm hoping the 3rd "A" is not anal)


Me: (whew!)
stupid strangers making sense - you've got to admit, that was like something out of a romantic comedy movie, you know where some stranger drops by to impart the hero or heroine with necessary knowledge in the situation

I, too, get drunk and am unable to stop talking
I, too, have some marriage issues
and I, too, would have assumed the third "A" was "anal"
Thanks Cate...now I know I'm not crazy...(yet, anyway).
So maybe there's really four A's
I need to somehow arrange for my wife to meet this guy.
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