Lately, I've been spinning my wheels every afternoon
on a stationary bike at the gym. Lately, every time I
get to the bike, there is a scowling fellow gym member
already on one of the two bikes. I'm telling
you...this man scowls at me...as I lower the seat &
get my butt settled on the bike next to the wall.

Why is he scowling at me? I start riding & he
speeds up. He stands up & peddles, like he's going up an
imaginary hill, he breathes heavily (& loudly) & spews
sweat in my general direction.
Not only am I inspired to puke in his general direction
(thanks for the sweat on my arm...buddy...but I'm just
not that into you)...but I really, really want to jam those idiotic
ear buds from his iPod deep into his skull.

I'd also like to do this to him.