...a male & female point of view...We are two former coworkers who share similar ideas on what's absurd...or just plain funny...thought we could offer a unique view on life & stuff...

Wednesday, November 30, 2005


Closed doors

Do you ever really know who lives next door to you? What goes on behind closed doors usually stays a mystery. As we were planning to move from our previous house a couple of years ago we were forced into becoming aware of what was going on in the house next to ours. It was Super Bowl Sunday. We had just arrived home from watching the game at my sister's house on her giant screen TV (with HD! If Hubby was telling this tale...this would be a prominent feature of the story). As we drove down our street, we saw a police car pulling out of our neighbor's driveway . It piqued my interest, we wondered about it...but then forgot about it & went to sleep.

The next morning, Hubby left for work. I watched his car leave & then stop. John (the neighbor in question) was in his car holding Hubby up from going to work. Again, I thought nothing of it (it was a little early in the morning for a chat...but...whatever). Later that day Hubby called me to tell me what he had been talking to John about. I couldn't believe it. John & Gina had always been the kind of neighbors we chatted with when we were both outside doing yard work...but they stayed to themselves...so that's as far as our relationship ever went.

Turns out that they had a knock down, drag out fight the day before. Gina had called the cops...these people had been married ten years & never had to call the cops before (this does not bode well...in my mind...about marriage in general). Gina told the officer that John had head butted her & then raped her (what the fucking hell?). Now, what's your first thought when you hear a wife cry...rape...about her own husband? Overly dramatic? Getting even? Yeah, I thought those things too (damn women...we really ought to stick together better than that!).

They threw John in the county jail & interrogated Gina all night long. Our other neighbor bailed John out & let him spend the night on their couch...that's where he was coming from when he waylaid Hubby & chatted his ear off. I was shocked. Could violence like this have been occurring right next door to me & I had no clue?

Worse yet, John called me a few days later...he wanted to get Hubby to stand up for his character in court. Yeah, uh huh...I really, really want to get in the middle of this whole thing...truly...I did not. I started to say no...but then thought better of it...this man obviously knew where I lived (duh). Was I foolish to fear this man?...nope...I went with my gut on this one...so I didn't say yes or no. Then he started telling me his version of the truth about what happened...did I ask for it? did I want to know? No...trust me...I didn't. He started telling me (& I quote) "Chick, it was beautiful, we made love like it was our first time..." Holy shit...Here's what I said, "John, stop talking RIGHT NOW...I can't hear any of this." Really, I couldn't...my head was about to explode as it was...plus, how weird was that? He wanted to tell me about his sex life? Listen neighbor man...you are seriously & forever creeping me out...STOP.

Cut to a few days later...I'm in the bank with my lawyer (we were selling the house, remember?)...& Gina happens to walk in. She sees me...our eyes lock, I feel compassion & sympathy...she walks up to me & we spontaneously hug (now here's the woman to woman support I was lacking within myself earlier...I may have been slow to catch up...but I finally did).

Want me to make this long story short...Too late you say? Here's the end...John got thrown in jail after using a female friend to fraudulently call up his broker & pretend that she was Gina to liquidate all their funds. He also was charged with spousal rape...or some such heinous thing...I'm not up on these laws & hopefully will never have to be...

He went to jail & while awaiting trial (about a month later) he either hung himself...or was killed...depending on who you talk to about it. Freaky what you don't know about your neighbors lives, huh?

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