...a male & female point of view...We are two former coworkers who share similar ideas on what's absurd...or just plain funny...thought we could offer a unique view on life & stuff...

Wednesday, March 28, 2007


Magic Undies

I went to a family function this weekend. It was all the way out on the North Shore of Long Island. If you know anything at all about LI...you know that it doesn't matter what time of day or night you'll be traveling...the traffic could potentially be a nightmare...so we had to leave early & I felt rushed.

I don't dress up that often...but when I do I kind of enjoy it. That's not to say that I didn't stress over what to wear (I hate that girl stress over silly things like this). I even made a trip to the mall on my way home from work during the week & walked out empty handed with a new hatred for all things mall related. My sister was right was right when she said that you can never find something when you're looking for it...you just have to get it when you see it (I'm fairly certain she was talking about clothes here...).

I ended up wearing my $40 H&M dress. It's a little black wrap dress that still needs to be pinned so as not to show too much extremely white cleavage. (Seriously, can any of you girlies out there ever wear a wrappy anything without wearing something under it or having to pin it?).

I should have done a dry run days before getting dressed (but does anyone ever do this...I'm sorry...but I'm just not that anal). I was all set except that I could not for the life of me find my magic underwear. & I mean I looked everywhere.

Do all women have magic underwear, or is it just me? You know, that one bra you love more than all the others. It's so pretty & it caresses me in all the right places. Mine is black & believe it or not...even has some lace on it that doesn't itch. (I could sing songs about this bra...that's how happy it makes me...but lucky for you...I won't). OK...bra taken care of...now for the panties...but no, they aren't in my undies drawer. On to the stockings & other things drawer...not there either...hell, I even checked my sock drawer for good measure...nothing. Damn...what could I do but put on my dress with regular panties? I know, I could have gone without...but I do not like drafts...so...that wasn't to be. I was all set...but...oh no...I spied some pretty apparent visible panty lines. Shit...can't have that...now can we?

The very last place I looked...(why is that always the case?)...my pj drawer...yes...there were my magic undies all safe & sound (my undie drawer must have overflowed). I did a little happy jig while taking off my un-enchanted panties & putting on the magical ones. My ass thanked me with a shiver (it knew it would be better presented in duds with magical properties...oh...it knew it only too well).

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