My car was on the verge of overheating the other day.

So I pulled into a gas station for some enlightenment.

The guy at the station looked just like Pedro from that movie (you know the one).

I asked him what he could do to fix the problem (my temp. gauge light was on).

He didn’t seem to comprehend my English mooocho.

So I stammered on even more.

He checked my oil.

I smiled & gave him a few bucks for checking.

What? He was so nice to me.

He said, “No, no”

& shook my hand away.

I said, “take it, it isn’t much”

He smiled & said...”I’ll just buy tequila”.

I drove away laughing.

As I sat there munching on my snack

Hubby came along (he must have heard the crunching).

"What-cha eating?" He said, as he squatted down low to get a good look.

"Pirate's Booty mixed with chocolate covered soy nuts" was my answer.

Straightening himself up in a hurry...he walked away.

I coulda sworn I heard a faint..."freak" uttered as he left.

Tomorrow, I'm throwing some fried tofu into the mix...just to see what he's gonna say.

Freak, my ass...

Go Fug Yourself posted this pic of Whatshername here. I'm not a fan (not my taste)...but the girl can sing & now apparently...she's got herself some style. I seem to neeeed that "kicky retro red dress". Can anyone help me find something like it? I'm not in love with the leopard accents...or the plastic red glasses...but the dress...do you love it?

Three glasses of wine...& it's bedtime for me (good night Gracie). I've plucked my eyebrows & folded Hubby's briefs (no kidding...I actually fold them in the way that Martha fucking Stewart taught me to before she went to jail...sexy, huh? Yeah, ALL of it)...so my work for today is done.

Feels like home.

I’m back from my adventures in Boston (where I died just a little bit). We arrived late on Friday night & went to grab a bite to eat. There was a huge table of men sitting next to us in the restaurant. I kiddingly told Hubby that it looked like a wedding shower...damn if I wasn’t right. I hate showers...but it turns out that gay showers ain’t so bad...by the end of our meal I was squealing like a gay man at the 400 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets they received along with what I hoped was a gag gift of crotchless bright red briefs.

The next day we went to the game. There is nothing like the energy of a Redsox/yanks game...nothing like it. We got to our awesome seats along the 1st base line, we were surrounded by fans & I felt like I was home. We look a couple of rows in front of us & what do we see? 2 Girls we met at a Sox games 2 years ago. We’d been e-mailing back & forth because I took a pic of one of the girls & her girlfriend with Wally (the Green Monstah) at that game & sent it to her...they bought us beers for the entire rest of the game as a thank you. What are the chances of seeing someone you know in a crowded stadium when you totally didn’t know they were going to be there & you both have completely different seats from last time? Weird, huh? I ran up & gave them big hugs...we bought them beers & they took us to dinner after the lame ass game.



Funny that Friday’s double header fiasco night was saved from the stink pile by a bunch of gay men...& Saturdays routing of the Redsox turned into a fun night because of our wonderful lesbian friends...who’d have thought that would have happened?


Hugging Wally was the only pleasure that fan was gonna get out of that game.

No...unfortunately I haven’t ditched it all & ran off to the beach for good. It’s not like I didn’t try. I haven’t been on vacation this whole damn time...too bad for me, right?

I’ll tell you about my vacation soon...& yes, I have pictures to go with it all (even a couple of little phone movies too). When I finally get my shit together I’ll share it with you...I will.

Why the picture of the balls you ask? Well, have you ever had the kind of day where it feels like life has grabbed you by the testicles & swung you around just a little bit? Yeah, I realize I don’t actually have any balls in the physical sense (& it could also be said that I need to start hanging out with more girls lately)...but it kinda illustrates my point nicely.

The baseballs also signify my upcoming weekend pilgrimage to Boston to see the Sox take on the yanks. Double header today...then I get to see Beckett (my 1st time...oh yeah...make it good) against the big ugly unit. There will be photos to come from this little trip too. If you said, "yeah right, Chick...you’ve been too sporadic here lately...I’m not holding my breath"...I really couldn’t blame you...it’s all been a test...you know...to see how fucking optimistic you are.